Throw Yourself Away
by BrookenLucas12
Summary: She hardly ate anymore. It was the only way she could conceal the pregnancy. Oneshot. BL.


**I'm pretty sure this sucks. I wrote it today, when I wasn't particularly in a "super writing mood". But I hope you like it anyway. And review. Also, I'm not entirely sure what happens to Brooke in this story is possible, so forgive me for being wrong. It's fan-fiction! Anything can happen in the fan-fiction world. Hehe. Enjoy.**

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**_Throw Yourself Away_**

She hardly ate anymore.

It was really the only way she could conceal the pregnancy. A friend of hers had once told her that her sister had hidden her pregnancy from her mother by eating very little. She'd only gained twelve pounds.

Brooke had gained six.

Six pounds hardly made a difference with a girl like Brooke. She was tiny anyway, and the extra weight she'd put on had made her prettier, if anything.

But then, it had only been six months.

And the lack of food was killing her. Slowly. She was no longer the usual cheerful Brooke that she'd been pre-Lucas. She didn't glow. She hated being pregnant. And yet she loved it.

The thought of having someone grow inside her. Someone who she could love. Someone who she could tell everything to. Someone who'd love her unconditionally. She loved that.

But she hated being pregnant. And she hated Lucas for getting her pregnant. She hated Peyton for ruining their relationship. And she hated herself more for still loving him.

It had been six months since she'd found out of her pregnancy. Six months exactly. Six months and two weeks since she'd discovered Peyton and Lucas's relationship. Six months and a day since she'd kicked ass at The Classic, and then returned home to take a pregnancy test.

The longest six months of her life. The scariest.

She'd vowed not to tell Lucas. Or anyone else for that matter. And she'd been doing a pretty good job so far.

No one knew. In a way it sucked. She'd once read that pregnancy was one of the best things that could happen to a woman, but for her, it was one of the worst. She couldn't tell anyone. And she couldn't eat. She'd had to quit cheerleading once she'd reached month five.

She was still popular. Many people watched her walk by with envy. Some pitied her, after hearing of her terrible break up. But everyone wondered about her. She was so mysterious. She went home straight after school, and she'd quit her favorite thing to do. She didn't talk to anyone anymore.

In the hallways, she heard the people talking.

_"Oh my God. Is that a cut on her wrist?"_

_"I can't believe Scott cheated on that."_

_"Is it just me, or is she looking a little chunky lately?"_

She tried not to hear. Tried not to care. Failed at both.

Weeks past and she was soon in her seventh month.

She'd gained ten pounds.

Bevin had helped her pick out her formal dress months before, and now she doubted she'd squeeze into it. She doubted she'd have the energy to.

She'd been nominated for formal queen. A cheerleader had notified her of this by her locker days before. Now, as she laid on her bed, contemplating whether or not she'd go, she felt sad.

It'd been her dream to win queen. A stupid dream, but a dream nonetheless. Chewing on her lip, Brooke subconsciously rubbed her hand over her stomach. It was funny how she'd never considered abortion. Or adoption. Neither looked appealing.

The dress didn't too much anymore either.

Brooke stood slowly, pulling off her tank top and sweatpants, sliding the dress over her body. She looked pretty, she mused. The dress was a little tight around the stomach area, but she fit.

Brooke did her hair and makeup, still not entirely sure she was up for a dance. She was after all, almost eight months pregnant and still not really showing.

After much contemplation, the brunette found herself at the top of a staircase leading to a dance floor. Many paused to look her over, while some ignored her very presence, going on with their own lives.

She didn't dance. She watched. She managed to smile when she saw Nathan and Haley. Marriage had done them only good so far.

When the nominees and winners were announced, she found herself not at all surprised at her loss. Of course she hadn't won. When was the last time she'd even said hello to someone?

Tears still formed in her hazel eyes, and she cried out softly when she felt a sharp pain. Standing, Brooke managed to get herself to the ladies' bathroom.

More pain.

"Oh my God." She bit her lip as she clutched the sink tightly.

The door opened, and there stood Peyton Sawyer. The girl that had betrayed her so terribly.

"Brooke, Brooke are you okay?" The blonde dropped her hand from her own stomach, where a dark red punch stain covered her mother's dress.

"I'm fine, okay? Please just leave me alone." Brooke managed through gritted teeth.

"Are you having cramps? I've got-"

"No, Peyton!" She shouted, tears running down her cheeks, "Just leave me alone, okay?"

"Are you, are you pregnant?" Peyton's eyes widened as she quickly left the room.

"No! Don't leave me!" Brooke found herself yelling after the girl. But it seemed she was long gone.

How was this happening? Was she having contractions? She wasn't even eight months pregnant yet!

The pain was unlike any other. Brooke crashed onto the floor. The world became a swirling mess, until she could no longer see anything but black.

-

"Brooke. Brooke? It's me. It's Peyton." Slowly, Brooke opened her eyes. She saw Peyton's face. And a hospital room.

"Oh no." She cried, her hands reaching her stomach. There was nothing there. No pudge at all.

Peyton bit her lip, reaching for her former best friend's hand. "You're okay, Brooke."

"My baby? What happened to my baby?"

The door opened slowly, and in came someone Brooke hadn't expected to see.

Lucas.

"Lucas? What are you doing here?"

He smiled weakly towards her, and Peyton quickly excused herself, pushing past him at the door.

Lucas took the seat that Peyton had previously occupied, grabbing Brooke's little hands in his own.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He traced patters on her hands.

"I'm sorry. I didn't - it was.. I'm not sure."

They were quiet for a few moments, as Lucas held her.

She didn't want to ask. She was too afraid. But she had to. "What happened to the baby?"

Lucas kissed her hair. "He's okay, too."

"He?"

"Yeah. Don't you remember? Peyton managed to get one of the teachers into the bathroom, and they helped deliver the baby."

"But I wasn't even eight months pregnant yet."

"He had to be put in an incubator. At first they didn't think he would make it, because he was so little. But they say he's fine now."

"Thank God." Tears splashed down her cheeks.

"You want to see him?"

"Please."

Together, the two visited their son in the incubator. He was small and weak, but still the most beautiful baby Brooke had ever seen.

"Let's name him Lucas." She said softly.

"But then we'll always get each other confused." Lucas argued.

"Okay, then how about Ryan? Ryan Lucas Scott."

"I like Ryan."

"So it's settled?"

Lucas nodded his head, slowly tilting up her chin to place a kiss on her lips. She reciprocated only briefly, before pulling away.

"But what about Peyton?"

"I love you."

"But I thought-"

"I was an idiot. I love you. And I love Ryan."

"I love you too. But things can't be fixed so easily, I mean-"

"I know I hurt you. But I swear, I will never do that again. I've been trying to get you out of my head for the past seven months. And I wasn't able to."

She looked down at Ryan. Then back up at Lucas. "I love you."

They shared a kiss.

Things wouldn't be easy, but they'd be okay.

Looking down at her new son, and then up into her love's eyes, Brooke knew this.


End file.
